Do you ever feel like your guy friend is giving off weird vibes?
Or maybe they’re a little too touchy. Maybe they have a few too many female friends, or they never want to talk about girls.
If you notice these things in someone with whom you’re intimate, it could be that he’s straight and just trying to get some.
If you encounter such a situation, what should you do?
Don’t worry! We have got your back! Keep reading to find out if the guy you met is pretending to be straight and how to deal with it.
1) He’s constantly near women
A straight guy will be naturally curious about the people around him, and he will want to engage with them.
A guy pretending to be straight will often want to stay as far away from women as possible.
If he is around women, he will be distant and awkward. He will be trying to keep his distance from them and not move toward them.
If he is around his kind, he will be relaxed and very comfortable in his own space. He will not be scared of women touching him and will not shy away from their advances.
2) He never talks about women
A straight guy will be more than happy to talk about women.
He will talk about his friends, family, exes, and people he is interested in dating. He will have a lot to say about the women in his life and what they mean to him.
If a guy is pretending to be straight, he will rarely talk about women.
He will be completely uninterested in talking about what his mother thinks about his new haircut or what his sister is doing now that she is engaged.
If a guy is talking about his family, he will only be talking about his relationship with his dad, nothing else.
3) He’s constantly around men
A straight guy will have nothing against hanging out with groups of men.
He will be very comfortable in their company and will be unafraid of dropping in a few jokes about how women are crazy.
Reverse, if a guy is constantly around men, especially if he is in a group of super-aggressive men, chances are he is not straight.
He might be trying to prove something to himself, or he might just be trying to fit in with his new group of friends.
He will spend his time with his friends talking about sports and girls from a purely sexual point of view.
4) He wants to be more masculine
A straight guy will want to be as masculine as possible.
He will want to fit in with his friends and be as suave as they are. He will want to be the leader of the pack and have all the girls fawning over him.
If he wants to be more masculine, he might be pretending to be straight.
In other words, he will try to act as aggressively as possible. He will want to be the leader of his group of friends, have a super edgy haircut and his wardrobe will consist of a lot of blacks.
He will want to be the one everybody looks up to and admires.
5) He won’t commit to anything and he has no interests
A straight guy will want to be as committed to you as possible.
He will want to spend as much time with you as he can, and he will want you to be as close to him as possible.
He will want to go on dates, take you on trips, and do all the things that couples do.
On the other hand, if a guy is pretending to be straight, he will want to keep his distance from you.
He will want to keep his options open and will not want to commit to anything.
He will have no passions, hobbies, or interests and will always try to change the subject to something he likes.
6) He’s overly sensitive to physical contact and will jump away from it
Some guys are just not comfortable with physical contact, and some are more sensitive to it than others.
If a straight guy is suddenly becoming uncomfortable with your touch, it could be because he is trying to hide his true sexuality.
If you hug him, he hugs you back a little too tightly.
Or if you accidentally bump into him and then quickly apologize, he might start jumping away from your physical contact.
If a straight guy starts becoming overly sensitive to physical contact, it’s a good sign that he might be trying to hide his sexuality from you.
7) He constantly talks about how much he loves women and hates men
There is a huge difference between loving the ladies and hating men.
If a straight guy starts talking about how much he loves women and hates men, it could be because he is trying to conceal his sexuality.
Some guys get so caught up in trying to prove how straight they are that they start to do really weird things.
One of those things is constantly talking about how much he loves women and hates men.
Most guys who are straight don’t go around saying “I hate men.”
They just don’t. If a guy you thought was straight suddenly started talking about how much he loves women and hates men, it’s a sign that he may not be as straight as you originally thought.
8) He shuns any place with a lot of gay men in it
If a straight guy avoids going to places with a lot of gay men in them, it could be because he is trying to conceal his sexuality.
If a guy you know who is straight suddenly starts shunning bars, clubs, and other places with a lot of gay men in them, there is a chance that he is trying to hide his sexuality from you.
Some guys who are trying to conceal their true sex aren’t just going to avoid places like gay bars.
They are also going to avoid things like Pride Festivals, LGBTQ+-themed events, and even gay-friendly work environments.
If a guy you’re friends with suddenly starts shunning places with a lot of gay men in them, it could mean that he is trying to hide his sexuality from you.
9) As a defense mechanism, he may ridicule other homosexuals
If you suspect that a guy you know might be gay, watch how he interacts with gay people.
If he is either very uncomfortable around gay people or he hates gay people, then he may be trying to hide his sexuality.
The reason he may feel the need to hide his sexuality is that he is ashamed of it. Homophobia is extremely common among closeted homosexuals.
If he constantly makes derogatory comments about gay people, this may be him projecting his issues with his sexual orientation onto others.
10) He is secretive about his relationships
If a guy you date is secretive about his past relationships and refuses to talk about them, he may not be as interested in you as he pretends to be.
He may also be dating you because he is not comfortable with his true sexual orientation.
If you find that he is secretive about his past relationships, yet is quick to talk about you to his friends (i.e. he only talks about you to his friends behind closed doors), then he may be keeping his sexuality a secret.
11) Body language
Gay men typically don’t act in a way that is considered “masculine.”
If a guy you know acts in a very masculine way (i.e. he loves sports, he’s aggressive and competitive, etc.), but he also exhibits other signs of being gay (i.e. he is secretive, he changes the subject when you come up in conversation, etc.), then you may be dating a closeted gay man.
If a guy is trying to conceal his sexuality and he is dating you, he may want to act in a more masculine way to blend in and remain inconspicuous.
If you notice that he seems very uncomfortable in his skin, he may not be comfortable with his true sexual orientation.
How to deal with it?
If I’ve outlined exactly one of the signs you’re experiencing and you’re not sure how to deal with it, read on.
Understand this I am here to provide you with:
1) Remember, it’s not your job to change him
When dating someone, you want to be with someone who accepts you for who you are.
If someone is trying to change you or is in denial about their true self, then you need to end the relationship as soon as possible. There are many reasons why a person would pretend to be straight.
If someone is doing this, they likely have their reasons. You can’t force someone to be open about their sexuality, and you shouldn’t try to.
2) Ask questions about how they feel
If you are dating a guy who is trying to hide his sexuality from you, then ask him questions about how he feels about gay people.
As much as he may not want to talk about it, asking him these questions may lead to an important discussion that needs to be had for the both of you.
Ask him how he feels about gay marriage and other issues related to sexual orientation.
3) Offer your support, even if you don’t understand what it feels like for them
If someone you are dating is trying to conceal his sexuality, try to offer your support anyway.
It might be hard for you to imagine what it is like for them since you don’t have any personal experience with any of this.
That said, try your best to understand what it feels like for them. If they are in denial about their sexuality, then they may feel extremely overwhelmed.
4) Don’t ask your friends about him or gossip about him behind his back
If you suspect that a guy you’re dating is gay, refrain from talking about him with your friends.
He didn’t tell you because he didn’t want to upset you or make you feel uncomfortable.
If he did tell you he was gay, then don’t do anything to hurt his feelings or make him feel like he has to hide anything else from you.
This goes for any rumors or gossip you might hear about him. Don’t spread rumors or talk behind his back.
5) Help him by breaking up
If your partner seems highly anxious about his sexuality, it might be best to break up with him.
Some men pretend to be straight to convince themselves that being gay is wrong or immoral.
Here’s why it’s impossible for them to date someone like you- because they only want to date women.
Don’t worry that he will be sad or upset because of this action of yours, be frank and say that you want to help him.
Trust me. This will make you and him feel lighter.
6) Don’t try to fix him up with other guy friends that are gay
If your boyfriend is trying to hide his sexuality and you suspect that he is gay, then don’t set him up with other gay guys.
This will likely only confuse him more and make it harder for him to come to terms with his sexuality. It will also make him feel like he has to hide his sexuality from his friends.
Let’s not forget, that everyone has their secrets and feelings and so do you, be him and you will realize that he needs time to think and face you.
Let him decide what to do next and respect him.
7) Don’t talk or make assumptions about his sex life
If you suspect that a guy you are dating is not gay, then don’t talk about his sex life.
If he wants to keep his sexual orientation a secret, it’s to protect him.
It can be hard to accept another person’s sexuality as gay and straight people tend to think they know how they do things. There’s a lot more to their sexual preferences than just sex and so you should respect that.
8) Do not ask a lot of uncomfortable or embarrassing questions
If you suspect that a guy you are dating is gay and he’s trying to hide his sexuality, then don’t ask him a lot of uncomfortable or embarrassing questions.
He will consider this very offensive and unacceptable. You also need to know that it is not right for you to ask such questions.
That said, it’s not your business to know his sexual orientation, nor should you ask questions that would force him to come out.
If you want him to be honest with you, then respect that and do not force him into coming out.
9) Take some time to think things through
If you suspect that a guy you are dating is gay and he’s trying to hide his sexuality, then take some time to think things through.
You might be afraid because you don’t know how it feels for him and what it means.
By now, you should take the time to figure out what he needs and if he needs your support or if he would rather be alone at this moment.
Ask him how he feels, or better yet just listen to his responses. You can trust his intuition.
I believe doing this will make him trust and be willing to share with you more, don’t let your relationship with him fall into a dilemma.
There are many reasons why a guy pretends to be straight. But in the end, they’re just not ready to come out.
However, if you want to find out why they did it, don’t let it be random.
Instead, talk to them candidly with sympathy and sharing.
I have provided the signs to know how to solve this problem if you are experiencing it.
And if you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to ask them in the comments below, or you can contact me directly through my email address with anything.
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